The Cry of a Struggling Soul

THE  CRY OF A STRUGGLING SOUL.

When I look at myself from within,
I know that in sin I am still living,
And with guilt and condemnation still struggling;
For with the world I'm already blending.

Though I desire from every sin to be free,
My flesh and self implies me to feel the glee;
"God's grace and mercy will forever be",
That it'll ever be remains my helpless plea.

Deep down in me, I know 'tis  not right,
But the tempter makes me feel I'm alright;
And then like a dumb sheep, along I play,
Even though silently within I pray.

Deeper and deeper in sin, I sink,
I'll eventually repent one day, I think;
Resting assured in the lies of the evil one:
"Don't worry, have a little more fun".

Void resolutions are what I make everyday;
"Today I'll get myself out", I always say,
"With fasting and grave remorse, I'll pray";
Alas! I end up living the same old way.

The times when in church I did get revived,
In tears I determined to pray and break through;
Then at the expense of my comfort, I survived,
But the days of my survival were so few.

Rising and falling, I become unstable,
Living my spiritual life in a circle,
Deep down, I know I'm contemptible,
But the throne of grace is still accessible.

I feel the Lord will consider all my goodness,
And just neglect all my backwardness;
But the Lord is no respecter of persons,
This particular sentence to me still frightens.

I know what to do, but I just can't,
My prayer of repentance has become a chant;
I hope that the Lord to me His mercy would grant,
And to me a new heart will replant.

I determine to pray and stand,
I determine to strengthen my mind,
I determine to rise up with vigour,
I determine to endure the rigour.

I don't want to be a cast away,
Lord, come and have your way;
I still want you to use me,
Jesus, help me.

I pray in Jesus name!

© Dahunsi Samuel Tolulope - 2018